Hell Week's Disjointed Thoughts

Just outside the door, one of Judi's night jasmines is covered with blooms. I love the smell, but it triggers my allergies and makes me feel like the inside of my head is a cluttered cavern of a place. (I wonder if that's why jasmine has the reputation it does.)

It's almost over, this week, thank god. The tests are all falling out in the B range, which is good. I live to fight another day.

I'm still in contact with my group from last term, so I hear news on the little message board that we kept up. That is how I know that the guy who expected to fail the pharmacology exam passed and the woman whom everyone expected to do great, failed. (This subject has a reputation for shaking things up.)

I don't often write about the group dynamic and my place in it. I will say that I have, in my groups, a reputation for being smart and funny, which is good, but sarcastic, which is bad. Sometime I come off as being mean-spirited. Sometimes I mean it, sometimes I don't. I don't know why I'm writing about that except to say that it is a kind of perennial personality bug or feature, one that I often don't know how to control.


I'm sitting with Crunch this week, so it has been good to get out for walks twice a day. His hips are going, so he can't walk very far anymore, poor thing. We content ourselves with walking up and down the grassy median in front of the house a few times instead of going to the park. He'd rather go to the park--as would I--but the day I tried to take him, he was miserable and limping after.

In other news: My allergies are going crazy today. I had to listen to someone's heart and lungs today and my ears were so congested that I could barely hear anything. Maybe I just need to invest in a more powerful stethescope. The ones that came in our kit are good but not great. I don't need one for cardiologists, but I would like to hear something.

And let's see. I had to skip our singing lesson this week since I was studying for my pharmacology exam. I thought about going, but I was glad in the end that I didn't. Those extra hours of studying pay off somewhere.

I should be studying right now, actually, but I think I deserve an evening off after the week I've had. Plus, with Memorial Day on Monday, it's a long weekend, so I have all that time to study. (Of course, I'll have to make up class on Wednesday, but that's fine with me.) I also have a few online quizzes to complete and so on, but still. Psychologically, a day off works, too.
 
Nothing else to report really.

Some of the things I've had trouble getting out my head this week: A handful of songs by tUnE-yArDs. An awful story that one of my fellow students told me about a rape case he investigated back when he was a cop. This feeling that I'm doing something right because The Brain's old obsessions have been pushed to the edges, so much so that they have almost seemed to disappear. (I'm not so naive as to believe that's true.) But at the same time, this nagging worry that I'm always doing something wrong. (How do I get rid of that one, I wonder. Is that what they mean when they say The Human Condition, I wonder.)