Me & Deesa: Before

Family
Originally uploaded by Tokyorosa

The tour of my family via my mother's photo collection continues with this: A photo of me (on the left) at about age four, with my cousin Deesa, who was a couple of years older. Deesa's sister--god, what was her name?--was (and probably still is) one of the most shameless thieves in the family. Seriously. She actually stole an envelope of money from my aunt at my uncle's funeral. (The money had been collected by my aunt's coworkers to help defray the cost of my uncle's services.) Mostly she was stealing to support a drug habit, mainly heroin but probably other things. Over the years, she was barred from entering most of my family members' houses no matter the occasion.

My cousin Deesa had her own problems. Her mother was certifiable--as in certifiably loony tunes. I seem to remember her, the mom, as having once gone to jail for killing a kid who trespassed in her yard. The dad--I think it was her stepdad--was also not the choicest nut on the family tree. I remember going over to play at Deesa's house after school and being overwhelmed by the horribly oppressive feeling of the place. After a couple of visits there, I asked my mother to deny me permission to go over there and she did the next time Deesa asked me in front of my mom to come over. Deesa's parents wouldn't allow her to play anywhere else, so that pretty much ended our playtimes together. Thank god. I had enough shit to worry about in my own house; I didn't need to have to deal with the shit in Deesa's house too.

About the photo: Deesa and I were playing dress up at my grandmother's house the afternoon this was taken. This was the "before" picture. There used to be an "after" picture that went with this--one with our faces painted and our clothes all screwy--but that picture has long since disappeared.