The Shower

I feel like I got hit by a bus, and showering reveals all the bruising and open wounds still happening. I can't look. I stand with my back to the water while Dave does all the important work, washing my back and sides. I can do part of my lower half. We washed my hair in the sink night before last--or was it last night? Codeine has a say in my sense of time (and Dave is out grabbing dinner at Shake Shack). 

After my shower, I got into a clean nighty (I modified three nightgowns with snaps down the front since I can't lift my hands above my head). Then I got back into bed. Dave checked my grafts and put antibiotic ointment on them and replaced the bandages.  

The next morning:

I've been having insane dreams, part period hormones, part codeine. I dreamt of a cross between a horse and a rhinoceros, a creature kept in a small pen in someone's front yard. I dreamt I was in a city, a cross between the city I live in and New York City. I was at someone's party and she and I left the party looking for food maybe and she bought a joint from a stranger on the street and asked if I wanted some.  I did, but as I did, I woke thinking, this is not a good idea. Last night I dreamt about our cat- and housesitter, but the dream started outside our house that wasn't our house, at night, in the snow, her own two cats accompanying me, curious about my actions. The dream ended inside the house, the housesitter friendly but frantically washing dishes while I made toast. 

I'm up now at 6:30 (was up until almost one a.m., up again at 4:30). I woke up Dave to help me out of bed, tried to describe the last dream to him. Then I needed the toilet. Now I'm having a snack (a small slice from a round loaf of sourdough bread, a slice of Swiss cheese, some cucumber, lots of water.  

Then I'll take another pain pill. Everything still hurts. It's slowly feeling better, but it still hurts.  It's been six days since the surgery. If like to start relying less on the Tylenol with codeine and even on the Tylenol, period, but for now it's a necessary evil. 

We had a blue sky yardage yesterday but it was cold out.  It's cold in the room now, truly cold for me, like 64 degrees. But I wake up hot (hormones). 

More to come.