Train Wreck

It's like a nightmare, this election. It's like watching a car accident or a train wreck. I swear to God if McCain and Palin get elected, I'm personally going to go around and slap every person of voting age in this country. If McCain stoops to stealing the election the way Bush did in 2000, I'm buying a gun with a scope and a ticket to Washington. Just my way of, you know, thanking our founding fathers for the First and Second Amendments of The United States Constitution. George W. Bush didn't gut that part of the Bill of Rights, did he? No? Whew. I'm sure he meant to get around to it during his third term. That is, before someone told him that he only got two. He was sure his daddy got three. Shows what drunks know.

Anyway, I mean it about the slapping for sure. But you don't have to take my word for it. Well, actually you do. Here are a couple of comments I've sent to my beloved New York Times.

About Palin:

Ms. Palin is the kind of redneck that my friends and loved ones in the flyover states love. She's everything that has made American the laughing stock of the world all wrapped up into one cute little stars-and-stripes bikini-wearing, rifle-toting package.

I love her vision of America! I mean, why not more pride in provincialism, scientific illiteracy, homophobia? Why not more minimally-educated, monolingual citizens? Why not more anti-abortion proponents?

It'll be a dream for the Republican party come true when she speaks out against universal healthcare and veterans' benefits (which, of course, her Iraq-bound soldier-son would never *dream* of needing or using).

About one of McCain's campaign drones who said that Americans who are dismayed about the economy are "whiners":

I'm one of those "whiners" who doesn't make five million dollars a year, who doesn't own one house (much less five or six), and who has not had a job that offers health insurance in I don't know how long. About the only thing I have that John McCain and his party want is my vote. He can whine all he wants, but he's never going to be able to pry that from me.

And, finally, about The One Himself:

Obama’s restraint stands in stark and beautiful contrast to shrill Republican rhetoricians’ attacks on his character and family. That he has to remind us that he is not running against Palin but against the suddenly silent McCain should serve to refocus our attention on the issues relevant to the election. I am impressed with Obama’s deep and abiding faith in the intelligence of the American people.

His faith in us will be his downfall.

And now I need a laugh. Here's a national treasure, otherwise known as Jon Stewart, with his take on this train wreck. (It's a long clip, but worth it.)